this dream

can only remember the part where i get stung by a poison spider on my palm(or any other kind of bug but i remember calling it a spider in my dreams)

my hand starts to burn and my feet too its super painful

i yell for help but i don’t get a response and the background chatter just continues casually

i yell again but then i see myself in third person. everything is black but somehow I know i know i’m in my own mind/head.  so it’s like an out of body experience and i can see myself laying unconscious on the floor from that spiderbite.

i realize this fact and instead I just frantically try to tell myself to wake up so I can get help and people can hear me..

so i literally wake up as opposed to waking up in the dream and i realize everything was just a dream

i go like “woah” like keanu reeves’s first movie ted and bill (i know.. probably not his first movie and it’s not called ted and bill)

lesson:dont go to sleep on a full stomach

Prince of the clouds

The Prince of Clouds was as kind and gentle as kind and gentle could be. As status of prince, he was to become the king of the clouds one day and no disrespect to the current king who’s doing a really great job but everyone looked forward to the day the prince would become king of the clouds.

Everyday, the Prince of Clouds would read and learn about how to manage the cloud kingdom and help the clouds lead to a better life. However, the prince had one secret. Once in a while, he would travel to the forbidden area. The area was the edge of the clouds. From the edge, the land and the ever-changing colour of the horizon could be seen. It was always the favourite place for the Prince to hang out and look. He would daydream and overlook the entirely new foreign place called the Land.

There was one particular subject that the prince of the clouds loved to study. John was a single father who held two jobs while studying part-time and taking care of the son and daughter. The prince noticed the care and love the father has shown. A thousand miles between the cloud and the land still did not deter the prince’s attention for detail.

As usual, the prince would sneak into the forbidden area and be just another daily observant. There is a reason why it’s called the forbidden area. Next to the edge always means the presence of the danger of falling. The temperature of the area started dropping gradually and a cold breeze sweeped by the area the prince was staying. The clouds crumbled piece by piece and without mercy took the Prince of Clouds with them. Pieces of clouds fell one by one and it was finally the prince’s turn.

The sound of the wind from falling whispers past the Prince seems to mourn for his imminent death. It goes “whoosh whoosh” exactly just like the Prince imagined what a crying wind what sound like. “If I may make a final wish…” says the Prince as he was about to collide against the rooftop.

Splash! The prince hits the rooftop and is shattered to a thousand pieces.

And I don’t exactly know how to write the following sequences.. but what happens is that the prince’s remains somehow continues the journey along the rest of the rain and enters the complex system that filters rainwater into sink/tap water. John the single Dad goes like “Ow” cause he burned himself while cooking breakfast/cookies whatever for his two kids and turns on the tap to soothe the scolded finger/hand with the running water which happens to be the last of the everloving, gentle and kind Prince of the Clouds.

Jane’s discovery

Jane lives in the world of computers. Sometimes she travels in-between the world we live in to learn and experience the daily things we call normal, but inside the static and un-bendable rules of computer is where she feels most comfortable.

Jane doesn’t mind spending most of her time at the computer. It may seem strange to outsiders but for those do know including Jane herself, the internet can be as big as the galaxy. It is a place where the border and the corners can be explored but to reach the realm is never-ending. When people ask Jane “How old are computers” or “How old is the internet”? The history books and encyclopedia states these things were only a recent invention. Maybe computers date all the way back somewhere to 1800′s but the internet only caught attention during the past 2 decades.

Only two decades old but the internet has developed so quickly from when it first began. Jane questions the speed of the development compared to life and the world itself. It’s progression is shocking when put into perspective. How did it all happen so fast? Are people, the creators of the internet just much more smarter than the creators of the world itself? But Jane sees it differently. Jane knows that the complexity of both creation is not a constant variable. Impatience is the key in difference.

People are impatient. Lost in the present state of mind, people are always looking forward to something in the future. Anticipation causes anxiety and stress. Constantly creating more “efficient” solutions, the society tells people to live their lives to be happy and to the fullest. When Jane was born, the meaning of life has been asked, but the mission to be happy all seems to be false encouragement and engineered by people as a lie.

Jane calculates the number of lives that appear to be infinite. The connection between is thin and far but it is most definitely existent. The galaxy is one big network like the internet. Everyone is a part of the cycle. Everyone plays a role. In that perspective Jane concludes that the meaning of life means to contribute to the chain that connects the different worlds together. It may seem insignificant but it is essential.

a little idea for a sci-fi manga/novel

The story sets on another planet maybe called Greentonia. The beings who live on the planet are mixed half plant half human. They have evolved so they enjoy advantages of both sides of the organism such as living longer, photosynthesis etc etc.

There is one human teenager called Clint that lives on the planet. He’s adopted and saved but he accepts Greentonia as his faithful home and is loyal to his family. He also has a childhood best friend but suddenly left him since one particular incident that will be explained later in the plot. The human teenager probably has some sort of skill hat he excels at such as science or fighting or something so he can be useful.

One slow day, a space travelling car accidently crashes on Greentonia. Clint goes on to check out the commotion and finds out that the passenger is also human. Clint is surprised since he has never met another of the same kind and humans are quite rare. This encounter leads him to a lot of questions.

After exchanges with the other human, Clint finds out about his story of Earth. Earth was suffering from global warming and the apocalypse and the Earth was about to be destroyed. Clint’s parents are first-class scientists and were part of the government mission to save Earth. However, for some reason the expected date of Earth’s collapse has happened prematurely. Clint was still a baby back then and he was launched out into space in a pod similar to the story of Superman’s trip to Earth. That’s how the Greentonia citizens found Clint and adopted him.

As Clint goes on a journey with the other human to find out more about Earth. He discovers a secret galaxy elite bandit group called Python like the programming language.

Python was actually the ones responsible for causing planet Earth’s premature destruction. They travel from planet to planet destroying each ones to collect their unique hidden elements in order to create their secret project – a timeline manipulator. Clint and his new group of friends that he made along the journey tries to stop this bandit group and the finale the readers find out that Clint’s childhood best friend actually plays an important role in Python.

Will Clint and his friends succeed in stopping the galaxy’s strongest bandit group?

My dream this morning

in a room having party
people in the party include mark cuban, a couple of heroes such as thor and superman, kids with mixed blood of human and animal and everyone else
random airplanes fly by the party in low altitude that can almost be touched by the people on land
the part suddenly gets attacked by hyenas
hyenas come in monster-like appearance
motives unknown
4 entry points to the party the heroes and mark cuban try to hold them back similar to the scene from LOTR the battle of helm’s deep
hyenas smell the kids with mixed blood and become suspicious
both sides hesitate to make their first move
the barrier is broken through and a fight is about break through
just as the fight starts
the leader of the hyena senses something wrong and screams for every1 to stop
the humans are taken back from the response and mark cubans being a champion convinces every1 to listen to the monster leader for the timebeing
the hyenas pounce to close all 4 doors
one of the door is getting knocked
a cg character in tights inspired by “the incredibles” with a ferocious dalmation all rendered by photoshop shows up and the monster leader shows fear but answers the door.
monster leader politely strategically dismisses the mean cg dude but knows its not the end of the exchange.
looks like the enemies are not gonna be between the humans and the hyenas… for now…

I do I do

James looks at Sally working away in the kitchen. He looks at her in a way where people would say the adjective peeking is more fitting.

James is Sally’s husband. James’s name used to be Harry until he met Sally and the producers of “Harry met Sally” decided to file a lawsuit against James so he legally changed his name. Sally never asked James if people of the opposite sex can actually be in a platonic relationship and James never gave his opinion on it. It wasn’t even love at first sight either. It was love developed through a relationship that was positive and supportive to each other and that’s when they both decided to get “married”.

Just chilling on the autumn beach with the cold breeze and the calm waves crashing into the sand. The couple sits side by side without touching each other.
Out of the blue, James asks “Hey, wanna get married”?
Sally thinks for a while and replies with a coy smirk “Hmm, only if you come up with the perfect proposal”.
“Well..” James hesitates a little. Then he gently places the back of his hand on Sally’s arm for a moment and asks “Then I’m going to ask you politely. Would you like to marry me?” The face of James looks exactly like a University student waiting to see their finals test score.
Sally gives James the biggest cutest grin and then hides it in her palms and through the sound of the wind and waves, a faintly mumble of “I do” was heard and that was the story of James and Sally’s marriage.

Ten years or a decade later, James peeks at Sally working hard in the kitchen. Sally notices James staring and hops over to him in bunny fashion, barks “ruff ruff” and gives James a big wet lick from bottom to top on the cheek. She walks away back to the kitchen while chuckling to herself. Caught in the moment, James couldn’t return the favour of a nice comeback. He plants his face on the arms resting on the table to hide the same smile and grin Sally had 10 years ago.

Motivation

David is an idea guy. He loves making inventions but lately it’s been the same everyday. Life is a rinse and repeat process until the energy dies. David throws his hands up in the air. “I’m bored! I need motivation for all this stuff. Gosh! This is making me puke intervals of zzz’s”, David complains.

It’s always the same speech on the internet. Seminars are scams. That tall dude with the squarest jaws ever named Anthony Robbins is not a part of David’s network so contacting him is a rare possibility. “What can I do?” David mumbles to himself.

David has a black cat named Sesame and Sesame loves resting on David’s keyboard in the morning. David pats Sesame on the head and on the body gently and looks at the cat with a frown on his brow as to communicate “What can I do?”. Sesame’s body language doesn’t change. David takes the hint as “I don’t care. Go kill yourself. If you’re gonna massage me do it properly meow nya nya” and leaves his work desk with a sinking heart.

Will David ever find motivation? Will David ever find passion?

He storms out of his house and yells desperately for help. His neighbour’s child Jason, a middle schooler happens to be riding his bike across the pedestrian walkway. Jason stops for a while. Looks at David in a confused manner. “What’s up with you today, Mr. Grown-up Nerd?” That’s the nickname Jason comes up for David because David is an adult nerd. David tries to explain his pursuit for motivation but the goal is slipping past his vision and grasp.

Jason doesn’t even flinch. He gets back on his bike and as he’s pedaling away from the nerd he loudly says “And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” The words surprise David into a little hop backwards. “The Alchemist, Paul Coelho. It’s for my English assignment.”

Jason is out of sight. David is still dumbfoundedly standing in front of his front door pavement “Damn that kid is cool.” David shakes his head sideways in respect. With a little flickering sparkle in his eye, he knows he can come up with his next invention.

“I’m Jason”

The brightness of the computer screen reflected upon Jason’s glasses in his dimly lighted room on a Saturday night. The “glowing” eyes complimented his intently stare. “What does it mean to be a real ninja?” Jason asks himself, 15 years old and unpopular.

Jason gruesomely scoured through the internet, his determination never fading as he clicks on the 33rd search page result of Google. Nobody ever visits pages beyond the 10th page because the results stretch to irrelevance. Anything after the 10th page is called the “unknown realm”. These things can’t even be called illegal because no one even knows what they are. Things that may scar your soul with regrets for the rest of your life.

I don’t believe in worrying

What is worrying? What is that sick feeling that you get when you think that something has gone wrong? It’s called worrying. I came up with that definition myself on the spot. Ok, I just checked google and thefreedictionary called defined it as feeling uneasy, troubled or concerned about something so I’m pretty much close.

For the majority of people, life is revolved around worry. This is like the third time I wrote it and it doesn’t even sound like a word anymore. But there’s homework and there’s a deadline, you haven’t done it yet and you start worrying. Late for work? Worry. Can’t make rent payments? Worry. What’s the point man? Most of the time we worry about the most helpless things. So I came through for myself and I just said fuck it unless I can help it, do something about it to make it better I’m not going to worry about it because worrying is not going to help the situation. On the other hand if you can do something about it, then stop worrying and go finish it up!

There has to be some biological design that make us worry. I don’t give a fuck we can redesign our system. It’s like the flight or fight response. It’s so old school back when we actually had to worry about tigers with ugly fangs pounce behind that bush and impale your fatass. I shouldn’t feel troubled about that cause those fkers were extinct long ago. However, the other things like getting to school in time and paying rent shouldn’t be harder than dodging jurassic creatures.

I can’t tell you how the process works because I’m not a dorky scientist…. yet. I’m guessing it has something to do with the anticipation of the consequence and that association with the feeling. But I can tell you some cool tricks I play on myself to make me stop feeling like shit.

1. Think it through – This is important. Everytime I worried I had no idea what the hell was going on. You panic because you make assumptions and think it’s gonna happen. Most of the time if you think it through, what is the worst that’s going to happen? And I’m not talking about the exceptions like sick family or stuff like that. I’m talking about the useless daily stuff we all encounter like being late for work/school. You’re on public transport and you’re sweating like a bitch. Unless you’re going to bribe the bus driver to cross the speed limit or hijack the vehicle, you might as well relax and spend your FREE time actually doing something you want to do.

2. Live life only once – You go through the motions like everyone else. You live and you die. Unless you enjoy feeling worried, then go ahead but most people know it’s not an enjoyable experience so why bother? Is it really that big of a difference between the decisions you choose from? It sounds like some life-altering choice you’re gonna make but in the end whatever you do you end up in the same place. Look back to some of the biggest decisions you’ve made in your life and did you think the other one was gonna completely screw you over? Sure, they both had their advantages and disadvantages, but again, it probably wasn’t that different. I might even quote Bill Clinton here from his autobiography that “a lot of your life is shaped by the opportunities you turn down as much as those you take up”.

That’s all I can come up for now. I might update this later. But I hoped this could help some of you guys out there. Good luck!

procrastinating and cyber sex

This is the weirdest title when I read what I wrote. I wasn’t even aiming for the shock value, but this title exactly sums up my post.

If you read my previous post, then you know that uni hasn’t been a pleasant experience for me so far. I haven’t really been procrastinating in terms of school work but I’ve been procrastinating the day. I don’t want tomorrow to come. I mean not many people do cause tomorrow means you’re one day closer to dying if you don’t have anything to look forward to. Waking up before 9am is a bitch. Makes me the most grateful person ever the days where I don’t have to bow down to the digitalized beeping from my alarm clock bought at the dollar store. Why can’t people procrastinate tomorrow/time? (Would make a great movie right? a kind of similar idea is in production featuring Justin Timberlake, FUUU)

So last night or very early morning, I was surfing celebrity gossip sites and there was this one ad that popped up like livejazmin.com or something that lets u camchat with ugly fat women. They kept saying stuff about free trials so I signed up for an account but apparently they still need credit collateral and they mean trial like u get to cancel before the payment period. No such thing as free lunch. Instead, there’s free chat mode and I try to hustle the girls to do the stuff they do in private.

This one Colombian trash tried to get me to pay her in broken english because she was so ugly there was no one else on her stream. She spoke like this – Recharge, credit, go, plz kisses, me, naughty. The fucking pentagon needs to hire me immediately because I didn’t think it was possible to decipher this retarded language. Instead I tell her to give me a strip tease for a preview so i know I can get my money worth then I will recharge. I would love to tell you guys that I made it, or come up with some awesome climax for my story but I’m having hard time building the incident so I’ll just end it straightforwardly. She actually saw through the bullshit and said recharge first. So what did I say? Obv go fuck herself and then I ragequit alt+f4 and went to bed… I couldn’t stop giggling while at bed cause I thought this was really sneaky funny. I only wish I had more time to fk around to see if any idiots would fall for it. But yeah it was a good night overall. Looks like things might be improving!